Friday was relatively slow starting after our run in with the local police department and Marge was trying to convince me to go to the local traffic office to pay the damn thing.
me being stubborn I’m not even contemplating it, and the fact that they don’t give you any guidance on local laws really annoys me .
however Today we have some sightseeing activities to proceed to on our 2 wheeled death trap from hell.
Elaine’s Abode does not come with a free breakfast because she has enough family to cook for by my estimate, so at around 9:30 AM we decide to hit the road!.
our Journey today will take us up into the foot Hills of Dumaguete to see the “Falls of Valencia” then across to “Sulfur Vents” and finally Lake Balanan to the South East of the island. we estimate this will take us the most of the day.
Scooter round 2
on our way to the Sulfur vents we decided to stop at Warzan Eatery that was a side of the road Canteen. I have Always been dubious about these places as the food is not really cooked for you it is more cooked in batches and left in a pot with the humid air awaiting its next victim and all I do is replay the 60 Minutes episode in my head on repeat that i saw 15 years ago on TV when i was a Teenager.
the episode was about how people who got severe food poisoning could eventually have it attack their spinal cord after a incubation period of up to 24 months and they were left Paralysed.
In the pots scattered around the till was a mixture of all kinds of oddities … none of which made me feel particularly hungry I must admit… i let Marge do her thing.
-Stir-fried String Beans
-Pork Nioaga (pork cuts in watery broth)
-White Rice
The pork was boiled in the broth and had more fat than meat… which became a tourist donation to the local dog population hanging around the street area. I compare this meal to something the Local Jewish Civilians ate in World War 2 hiding from the Gestapo.
I wont complain it was edible and it was dirt cheap. i think it cost us 4NZD for that meal.
As we started to get out of the City of Dumaguete the road starts to climb in elevation, the Falls are a popular tourist destination here as you can swim in them and they have a vary Picturesque bridge that everyone takes photos on.
after another 20 Minutes of winding up the valley and making a few wrong turn (we ran out of cell signal for the Google Maps). we finally came to the Pulangbato Falls Valencia.
we parked the scooter up and in great fashion of the Philippines we had to pay a fee to see the falls, the Entry fee of 100 Peso’s each. this proves a problem because their currency is in the following denominations
-1000 Peso
-500 Peso
-100 Peso
-50 Peso
-20 Peso
and to really help out the population the silly ATMS give you 1000 Peso Notes…. so when it comes to paying for anything big or small you have to use a 1000 Peso note which means you then have to get a lot of notes in change….. this causes a problem as most establishments which are in remote areas or small turnover business’s cant break a 1000 Peso easily.
i only had 500 as my smallest denomination and as we were one of the first there at the falls for the day the gentleman only had 100 peso change so we had to wait for a few more people to come through until
i could be settled up.
this didn’t prove a problem as the falls were very warm to swim in so it just meant more time to relax and take photos
we spent about an hour at the falls relaxing and taking photos with Gerald.
after the falls there is a local Hot spring down the road called Red Rock Hot springs. these are naturally heated by the sulfur thermal vents that expel sulfur gas out of veins in the earths Crust.
Marge asked if i wanted to stop there but i explained i would much rather sit in a natural spring of hot water on a cold winters day than a Stinking hot humid day…. only to get out and sweat some more and smell like rotten eggs for the next 8 hours on a scooter.
on our decent back to civilisation we stopped at a photo spot with the vents and took some photos, I always hold my breath in these photos too make sure i look like I’m in better shape than what i am… and also Sulfur isn’t particularly good for the raspatory system.
At the bottom of the hills we turn right and start heading down towards the coast, the coast will take us down to the bottom of the island for 45Km, we will then turn inland and head north into the hills again for 10 KM to the lake.
the State highway on the coast is long and straight with us passing through a variety of roadside towns and stalls. there is no given speed limit here…. well there is but no ones vehicles can go much faster that 100KMh due to poor roading and also poor upkeep of the vehicles.
our scooter was another Suzuki Axio 155CC and it could make good time bopping along nicely at 85Kmh (as Matthew Smith would say).
the journey south takes only around 35 minutes and before we turn off into the hills we both agree out buttocks need a stretch and we need a drink to cool off. even going at 85Km/h you still sweat in this humidity.
we pulled over in the last town called Siaton and stopped at a small roadside shop. I had a Royal Cola and marge had a Orange Fanta… and NZ Fanta is a lot less sweet….. but the Filipino version tastes a lot more like orange which is interesting, I also Spied a great meat shop name so i decided to take a photo just for the laughs.
10 minutes later we are at our turn off to head inland.
the road was narrow and windy and we expected to see tourists vans but after 3KM on this road it turned to a very rough washed out gravel road. this meant having to go around 10Km/h to navigate the large rocks and trying to balance not only a bike but Marge, who, couldn’t really see what was going on Infront made the ride slow and tiresome.
there was 2 paved sections of the road, 1 was at the 4KM and the second was at the 7KM mark.
once we got to the 8KM mark the road was paved again and we are literally the only ones on the road now
this was truly the back country and we both joked and said we hope we don’t get a flat tyre out here!
we came to the small village of Balanan and stopped at the Checkpoint where a very relaxed man said we had to pay …… a entry fee!!! wooo hooo my favorite a total of 50 Peso per person, as we rode up the last 500m to the clearing at the top of the hill there is a very still quiet lake that is towered by the top of the mountain surrounded in cloud (not nice looking ones either).
the lake is moderate size, to the right of the carpark is a outdoor seated area with a restaurant that had around 10 people sitting in it. and to the left is a walking track that takes you around the lake a part way.
I was suppressed that there was accommodation up there that was on the high side of reasonable but i wish I had known as a night up by the lake would have been nice.
the lake is surrounded by mosquitos but oddly enough they aren’t interested in our skin….i wish i could say they same for the ants that seemed to have a field day crawling up our shoes and legs by the 100’s
you can rent boats and kayaks on the lake however these looked like they hadn’t been launched since Covid 2020 as they were all pulled up on the shore looking like salvaged parts of the Titanic.
after our relaxing stroll we decided that lunch was in order so we went to the restaurant and had some local Filipino food, sadly a lot of establishments have large menus but only have around 10% of the produce in stock to actually make 3-4 dishes and as Gordon Ramsay says “get the Fuck out of my Kitchen”…. no not the words mi looking for…… he actually says….
“you are better to have a short menu with high quality dishes that are popular in the local area, rather than a huge menu of diverse items, this will keep food holding and wastage down and will keep up the quality and satisfaction of you customers” .. well along those lines. you get the idea.
i wish i could remember what I had but I cant. I know it had rice!
as we finished our lunch the clouds started to turn black and angry with the occasional flash of lightning and thunder, i made note to marge that we should escape before we get stuck here for 2 hours waiting for the rain to clear.
we hit the road hard and fast and descended the hill in record time.
the trek back up the coast was swift and we managed to keep the clouds at bay, our transit time back to the accommodation was around 50 minutes and we got back to Elaine’s abode at 4:30 PM, Marge wanted her 30 Year old late afternoon nap and i decided that i needed to go on my 10Km walk that had been lacking the last few days and i was feeling guilty.
i returned from my walk at 7PM covered in sweat, road filth and more carbon monoxide in my lungs that probably what a pack of cigarettes would give you… the streets here are filthy and it makes you appreciate the clean NZ air….except for Auckland. there air in the city is rubbish.
i had a shower and woke marge up and we agreed that we should go and find some rehydration and a good meal, Marge has been talking about a bar called Tiki bar that is located by the Esplanade down on the waterfront. the bar is not far from the restaurant’s filled with dirty old men hoping to find the love of their life.
I am all for Old lonely men trying to find there next squeeze but i do feel uneasy when i see a man with someone that is probably similar to an age of a grand daughter or daughter….. that seems odd and dysfunctional in my eyes… but hey i suppose that’s life.
Tiki bar is more of a night club than a bar and we arrived at 7:30 Pm. the outdoor area is big with a lot of tables and bar runners to serve drinks to patrons. the area outside is non-smoking which is a nice surprise. well non tobacco … vape only.
San Miguel is slowly becoming a favorite beer of mine and seems to be very rewarding after a hot day in the sun sweating and navigating a country that has very little road rules in it… believe it or not drink driving here is not an issues.. like no limit or road side breath testing. marge informs that if your swerving all over the road and out of control you can be detained and fined. but only at the extreme end of the spectrum. this gives great comfort as i sink my 3rd beer on the couch at the outdoor vapers area.
people watching here is quite amazing. in eastern Europe most bar patrons will talk with one another, laugh, enjoy the company. as I look around the bar with the music playing and drinks being served…everyone has a mobile device and sits in silence.
to the right of us sits 2 couples and they have cocktails of god knows what drain cleaner from the local Sari sari (convenience store) and all they are doing is on there phones . i think the only thing anyone has said to one another is showing them some stupid tiktok post.
when did we all become so disconnected in social situations?
dinner will finally be at Hayahay where marge has been wanting to eat since we got here. the restaurant is located up a narrow stairwell at the back of the lower bar. as we ascend the stairs to the second landing we see the place is packed to the rafters. they don’t do reservations so its really just try you luck and hope like hell you get a table
luckily as we arriving, departing is military man Sam who is in his later 30’s with nothing short of what i would call a Filipino Prostitute have finished dining and look like they are going to consummate their dinner with humid hot and sweaty hotel sex. Marge B-lines for their table and we wait patiently for it to be cleared.
the menu is yet again one hundred items and most have “X” marks over the price meaning no i cant have the double cheese burger and fry’s.. who built this country! to deny a many his burger and fries after a day of dangerous driving, swimming in waterfalls and a 10KM walk….. its just criminal!
marge orders her famous Fish soup that has the head bobbing in it that does nothing that make you want never watch the Disney classic “finding Nemo” ever again and I have a sweet an spicy port on rice….. knowing very well I will be force fed the god damn fish head when marge is full!
dinner takes an hour and we exchange light conversation on our adventure to the lake and how nice it was to be out of the city and all the polution for a number of hours.
we both agree its time to call it a night.
and yes… I did get force fed some of that awful fish broth!
I will leave this piece on the note of Gordon Ramsay
Gordon Ramsay
I’m not critic-proof, and I still take it personally, but I take it less personally now.
-Gordon Ramsay-
Quantum Entanglement 